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Tips for dealing with a narcissistic co-parent during divorce

| Aug 11, 2020 | Family Law |

Some adults are able to set aside their differences during a divorce or breakup and do what’s best for the kids.  If you ex is a narcissist, however, the chances of being able to do this are slim because the narcissist is probably unable to consider what anyone else needs.  You might find it very difficult to navigate a child custody matter with a narcissist.

When you’re dealing with a person who is narcissistic, you have to realize that they will do everything they can to control the situation.  You can minimize their ability to do this if you document all communications.  This means that all communication will have to be in writing such as email or handwritten or typed letters, even text messaging, so that you will have an account of what the narcissist says.

Using written communication can also help you to ensure that you are responding to the narcissist’s messages in the most effective manner possible.  You can think about your replies before you send them and ensure that they are accurate and detailed and do not provide the narcissist with the ammunition they are looking for when they talk to you.

When you use written communication, you are also less likely to get dragged into discussions about things outside of child custody.  Your replies can focus only on the child custody matters while you essentially ignore the other things that they might try to talk about.

If you’re divorcing or breaking up with a narcissist and have children with them, it’s essential to ensure that you have a solid parenting plan that outlines the responsibilities for each party and provides you with information about how to handle specific situations.  Your attorney can help you to determine what points should be included in the parenting plan.

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